Tomasito's Diary
Sex and the City - A Column

| 03 | The Importance of Being Earnest? Or: Mr Nice Try. |

What a girl wants – not only a song by Christina Aguilera (so here the fulfilment of attracting a ‘young people crowd’), also a very important thing to know for men. It’s very interesting to observe couples on the streets. One often can ask: How did this creep get that beautiful girl? Or another example of a couple: boring plus boring equals an over-proportional increase of a kind of human death. Or this “chulito”, that cool guy, that goes for every healthy girl that doesn’t work at the butcher’s (or maybe even better if she does).

So, how do you know who is the right for you? Or the other way round: What is the type of girl that is feeling attracted to you – and what do you have to represent to make yourself attractive to that kind of specific clientèle?

Let’s discuss two species. There’s this one sort of guy that is nice. Yes, exactly: ‘nice’. English native speakers nod understanding when they hear this. Actually there’s no description necessary. That single word says and explains everything. He’s a ‘nice guy’. But nevertheless I think I should define it a bit. It’s the attentive type of guy. Before dinner he helps you to sit down at the table, adjusts your chair, or if not necessary or too far away he waits until you are seated. After eating he asks politely if you mind if he smokes a cigarette. Another situation: After shopping he’s the one you ask to carry the box of 10 mineral water bottles up to the sixth floor – and he does it without grumbling. If you ask him something, he’s glad he can help and accomplishes it with gusto. He even anticipates every wish of your’s – just by looking at your eyes. He’s the nice guy. But it this the guy a woman wants? Yes, he is. If she doesn’t want to pay the delivery boy or the guy that is doing civilian service (instead of military service) and normally just serving old or disabled people…

Mr “Chulo” – Mr Cool is the second object of observation. Is he maybe the desired item? He can light the woman’s cigarette with his Zippo lighter just by using one hand (at best even only using his left one) in one smooth movement. He doesn’t talk too much. And if he talks he knows the right words, the right phrases. It seems he has secrets and he doesn’t want to reveal them – though if he did, well, you know where it would end (maybe that he’s 30 and his mum is still cooking lunch for him and she deposits it every day in Tupper ware in front of his flat door). But the appearance is that he’s a mysterious guy. His wit is not very refined, but he’s okay looking from far – so who cares? And also after some drinks an entire world changes. Closed up you see earwax in his ears and if you observe him while he’s standing, it seems he has a humpback and is not standing straight up. He doesn’t smile too often – again to underline his ‘mysteriousness’. He forgets one’s birthday and leaves the good friend of the girl carry the box of 10 mineral water bottles up to the sixth floor. He’s a bit antisocial, but this awards him the cool image. And due to this he’s probably fairly well in bed, many may think. And rough. And more taking than giving. But these are just assumptions.

Is that the guy a woman wants? Yes. Not for marriage. But until that age: yes. Maybe also a bit later when she married the other one, that one that is carrying the box of 10 mineral water bottles up to the sixth floor EVERY DAY – as the three children and his wife drink each two litres of water per day as recommended by the ministry of health. But then she might seek the opportunity again to spice up her life a little bit. But that’s a different story.

So, it’s the question of behaving honest and earnest or of behaving mysteriously and a bit jackassy. It’s the same as in the popular saying: “Good girls get to heaven, bad girls everywhere.” Life is a party and you are just the drinks supplier.


Site by Tomasito - 30.09.2003